I don’t know about anybody else, but my mind has been all over the place pretty much all of 2020. There has been so much grabbing at our attention and at our hearts. It has been one hell of a year to say the least and we have pretty much been logged in for all of it; whether it’s work, the news, school, or social media.
An old friend of mine told me, “don’t take this the wrong way, but you’re so focused on everything that you really don’t get anything done. Your attention is always split.” Spoiler alert, I didn’t take it the wrong way. I was actually really appreciative of that fact that someone was being honest about a shortcoming of mine that they noticed. I mean if I’m being honest with myself, what my friend told me was true. I do have lot going on, but lately, I’m not getting much done. I don’t have the energy and self motivation I need to do one thing well so instead I take the little energy I do have and try to do a lot of little things at least halfway decent. That’s actually not working out that well.
I had to really sit with myself and figure out what’s going on? Why am I spreading myself all over the place? It took some reflection, but I realized, it’s not even me that I’m spreading myself thin for. It’s the idea that I adopted that I need to be there for everyone else; my family, friends, men, my job. And not that being there for everyone else is a bad thing, but at what point do I show up for myself?
When is the last time you stopped and thought about what actually brings you joy? If you could wake up everyday and do whatever you wanted, what would those days look like? I’m becoming more aware of that fact that whatever I want my life to look like is on me. I’m responsible for the time and dedication needed to get there because as long as someone else can ask me to share my gifts, advice, and insight for their benefit, they will. And it’s okay for me to share my gifts with the world, I just can’t forget to share them with myself too.
So this week I challenge you to lock back into yourself. Pour back into yourself because you deserve the same magic you try to pour into everyone else sis.
XOXO
Elayne MeShell